I know that heart
I know the wounding behind the pride
The desperate desire for stillness in the drive
The seriousness hiding in the jokes
The mask that wears the stoke
I know the playfulness
I know the energy with nowhere to go
The insatiable desire to see more, to know more
To never settle for less than before
To take it all in
Like wind to a wall
Carving out channels
Rivers funneling to a fall
Getting lost in making up for lost time
Trusting in the ability of the body before trusting in the instinct of the heart
Pushing muscles and bones to injury
Trained in discipline and obedience
In a culture that profiles the best
And hands you a measuring stick
It doesn’t matter that no one told me I had to be the best
I saw the way that pedestal was lifted
And I longed
Have we forgotten we are kids
Have we forgotten at one point we already thought we were the best thing in the world
And so we were
Trying to find our own way out of obedience
And then out of rebellion
Don’t stay in either of those cages
This chance to live happens briefly
What is it that you really want?
The impossible question
That joy, that aliveness
It starts in here
It’s not out there
Not in the mountains, or the canyons, or the rivers
Not on the soccer fields, the stages, or the nightclubs
Those landscapes and how you fit into them are a projection and a reflection of what’s inside
Climb the mountains rising and crumbling within you first,
And then you will see
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